Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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