Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
