She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
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