So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize