I need help removing her.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
