yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
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