that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Randomize
