Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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