the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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