whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
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