But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
