She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
