one two three fourrrrnication!
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
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