I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
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