we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
