I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Randomize
