I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
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