so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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