A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Randomize
