that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Randomize
