How'd it feel making her break her religion?
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Randomize
