So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
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