Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Randomize
