I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
We are two peas in an std pod
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
Randomize
