just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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