If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
and you said cock pushups were impossible
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
