She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
