i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
