Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
