3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
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