Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
His hands were made for my vagina.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Randomize
