I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
