I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
