I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
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