4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
Randomize
