Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Randomize
