it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
