Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Randomize
