Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
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