I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
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