remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Randomize
