Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
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