Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize
