His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
You have to summon your inner elephant
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
