sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
