ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
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