I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize