Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
