In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
