that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize