I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
